It is always frustrating to find established settlements on the other side of what you thought was a frontier, but with the humiliation comes shelter, a shower, a bed, a hot meal and good company.
As I tuck myself in, I recall St. Nietzsche’s kind words: “A sign that a man suffers from envy but is striving for higher things: drawn by the idea that in face of the man of excellence there is only one way of escape: love.”
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Unless you are a glutton for humiliation, stay away from philosophy, religion and all other insight disciplines. Here you cannot know what you do not know until you have learned how to know it.